Relationship Health Profile Test

How healthy is your relationship? How would you score in Dr. Phil’s relationship test?

1. I am satisfied with my sex life. True False
2. My partner doesn’t really listen to me. True False
3. I trust my partner. True False
4. I feel picked on and put down. True False
5. I am hopeful about our future. True False
6. It is not easy to share my feelings. True False
7. My partner often says “I love you.” True False
8. Sometimes I feel rage. True False
9. I feel appreciated True False
10. I am out of control. True False
11. My partner is there for me in hard times. True False
12. My partner is harsh in his or her criticism. True False
13. My partner understands me. True False
14. I fear my partner is bored. True False
15. My partner doesn’t like to share what’s on his or her mind. True False
16. I imagine myself divorced. True False
17. My relationship is what I always dreamed of. True False
18. I know I am right. True False
19. My partner treats me with dignity and respect. True False
20. My partner is a taker. True False
21. We often do fun things together. True False
22. Sometimes I just want to hurt my partner. True False
23. I feel loved. True False
24. I would rather lie than deal with a problem. True False
25. We still have a lot of passion in our relationship. True False
26. I am trapped with no escape. True False
27. My partner thinks I am fun to be with. True False
28. Our relationship has gotten boring. True False
29. We enjoy going out on dates alone. True False
30. My partner is ashamed of me. True False
31. We trust each other a great deal. True False
32. We have become nothing more than roommates. True False
33. I know my partner will never leave me. True False
34. I am no longer proud of my body. True False
35. My partner respects me. True False
36. My partner constantly compares me to others. True False
37. My partner still finds me desirable. True False
38. We just seem to want different things. True False
39. I am allowed to think for myself. True False
40. I feel crowded by my partner. True False
41. I am honest with my partner. True False
42. People have no idea what our relationship is really like. True False
43. My partner is open to suggestions. True False
44. My partner has shut me out. True False
45. My partner is my primary source of emotional support. True False
46. I feel judged and rejected by my partner. True False
47. My partner cares if I am upset or sad. True False
48. My partner treats me like a child. True False
49. My partner puts our relationship ahead of all others. True False
50. I’ll never satisfy my partner. True False
51. My partner wants to hear my stories. True False
52. I chose my partner for the wrong reasons. True False
53. I look forward to our time together. True False
54. My partner thinks I am boring in bed. True False
55. My partner is lucky to have me. True False
56. My partner treats me like an employee. True False
57. I win my share of disputes. True False
58. I envy my friends’ relationships. True False
59. My partner would protect me if necessary. True False
60. I am suspicious of my partner. True False
61. I feel needed by my partner. True False
62. My partner is jealous of me. True False

Now go back over your test and count all of the even-numbered questions to which you answered True. Now go back and count all of the odd-numbered items to which you answered False. Add that number to your “True total” to get your overall score.

Even-numbered “True” responses_________

Odd-numbered “False” _________

OVERALL TOTAL _________

If your overall score is above 32, it is likely that your relationship is in extreme danger of failing. If your total score is between 20 and 32, then your relationship is seriously troubled and you may be living in an “emotional divorce.”  If your total score is between 12 and 19, then your relationship is probably above average (which is not great) and certainly needs work. If your score is below 11, then your relationship is well above the norm and may have isolated areas in which you can improve.

©2000 Phillip C. McGraw, Ph.D.


Relationship Rescue - Buy It HereThe above test is an excerpt from Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy for Reconnecting with Your Partner By Phillip C. McGraw, PH.D. (Published by Hyperion; 078686631-4; $22.95US/$32.95CAN).

Phillip C. McGraw, Ph.D., has worked in the field of human functioning and strategic life planning for over twenty years.  He is the co-founder and president of Courtroom Sciences, Inc., and has been associated with some of the highest-profile litigation cases in the country, including Oprah’s highly publicized “Mad Cow” suit.  A professional psychologist, he lives in Dallas, Texas, with his wife and family.